Image Description: A long-haired brunette woman with large breasts and very high tan heels rides an antique rocking horse, while looking at the camera.
Caption: The Great Shift was rough on five-year-old Connor Lawrence. First, it took forever for his parents to come get him from that weird mansion. When he got home, none of his old clothes fit anymore, and he hated going to gross girly stores with his mom to try on gross girly clothes (though he did like how tall he was in his new shoes). Then Dad said he wasn't allowed to see any of his friends until he started wearing his big girl clothes! It was bad enough that he looked like an icky girl; he wasn't going to let his friends see him dressing like one! Besides, it's not like he had much interest in any of his old toys anymore.
Except the rocking horse.
The rocking horse was his new favorite.
Commentary: I feel like I left out a line here about playing toys with his friends that would have made the ending work a little better. Oh well, maybe someday I'll do some Special Edition re-edits of old captions to fix that kind of thing.
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